Chapter 5: Roadblocks to Giving

"People tend to run out of money before mirages, so they cling to the myth that things they can't afford will satisfy them.  Solomon's money never ran out.  He tried everything, saying, 'I denied myself nothing my eyes desired; I refused my heart no pleasure.'  (Ecclesiastes 2:10).  Solomon's conclusion?  'When I surveyed all that my hands had done and what I had toiled to achieve, everything was meaningless, a chasing after the wind.' (v. 11)" - The Treasure Principle, Chapter 5  

“...the respondents turn out to be a generally dissatisfied lot, whose money has contributed to deep anxieties involving love, work, and family. Indeed, they are frequently dissatisfied even with their sizable fortunes. Most of them still do not consider themselves financially secure; for that, they say, they would require on average one-quarter more wealth than they currently possess.”  The respondents–120 people with a net worth of $25 million or more–were asked to write responses to certain questions..." -  Don't Envy the Super-Rich, They are Miserable, The Wall Street Journal

Back in 2016, a fashion company called Lularoe was becoming wildly popular selling dresses and leggings.  Facebook and pop-up boutiques were everywhere.  Consultants, anxious to grow their business were pouring money into inventory, and customers, anxious to find that one special piece in their size, in their favorite print, were on the hunt.  (Keep in mind everyone involved is anxious, and primed to think their next big find is just around the corner.)  

It was very easy to build excitement around this fad.  But behind the scenes were untold hours of time, both by the buyer and the seller, to procure just the right pieces.  After all, guess what everyone loves?  Clothing shopping!  Guess what everyone hates?  Doing the laundry!  And yet, somehow the two are related.  I can only joke about this because I've fallen victim to it just as much as anyone else.  But I started talking with a friend of mine about how we both were starting to feel like "inventory managers" with our own possessions, in our own homes.  Searching for the latest trend may give you a jolt of energy, but almost immediately, you find yourself rearranging to accommodate your newfound "treasure", having to clean it, buy accessories for it, and guard it from damage.  The end result is a lot of fatigue.  And to remedy that fatigue, you'd need a new jolt of energy.  Repeat cycle.  

In this chapter of "The Treasure Principle," Alcorn talks about roadblocks to giving.  One that I believe could be added is the above "cultural programming" that we are saturated in.  As with any addiction, the cyclical nature of it is the most sinister part.  However, we can harness this cyclical tendency on the giving side of the equation as well.  Jon and I have been blessed to have the opportunity to give to a friend in need on various occasions, and I can say firsthand, that helping someone also demands repetition, but it multiplies joy.  Instead of a draining fatigue, it is truly energizing.  And for those times when we give anonymously, we have bonded as a couple over the shared secret.  

No matter where you land on the income spectrum, see what you have to give (money, a listening ear, an act of service) that could bless someone else.  Just like tithing, I believe God is OK with us testing out this promise and seeing Him multiply our joy in the process. 

- Rebekah Arias

Chapter 4: Eyes On Eternity

"Our instinct is to give to those who will give us something in return.  But Jesus told us to give to "the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind...Although they cannot repay you, you will be repaid at the resurrection of the righteous."  (Luke 14:13 - 14).  If we give to those who can't reward us, Christ guarantees He will personally reward us."  - Randy Alcorn, The Treasure Principle

Most people would probably agree that it's wrong to keep score in relationships.  Whether it's a best friend, your roommate or your spouse, once we start keeping mental scoreboards, it's all downhill from there.  And yet, it's so easy and natural to do.  The most ridiculous example from my own life happened in high school.  This was back when everyone exchanged wallet-sized pictures and carried them around in mini photo books.  Showing off your photo book was the modern equivalent of reviewing your social media contacts.  Who you knew, and who you had pictures of was important.  Equally as important was the consideration of who was showing off pictures of you.  So I developed a "friend" (quotes intentional) in one of my classes.  She and I were only acquaintances but after every dance we attended, we'd sync up and exchange dance pictures.  I felt popular!  But I tried to remain low key about it.  This continued on for several dances, until one where she attended and I did not.  I wasn't sure how the next day would go.  Would I receive if I had nothing to give in exchange?  She approached me, told me about the dance and showed me her picture.  I admired it and we chatted some more.  But she took the picture back with her when she left.  I had nothing to offer her so she didn't want to waste a picture on me.   Luckily, even at the time I realized this was the definition of a fairweather friend.  I'm happy to say I was able to laugh it off and move on.  

The story has stuck with me just because it is an example of obvious and absurd scoreboard behavior.  But as we get older, it becomes more nuanced, and it's easier to hide or justify why we shouldn't have to "throw our money away" and get nothing in return.  In fact, in the US, we're so used to getting exactly what we paid for, that we insist on reversing the exchange (and getting our money back) if it doesn't meet our expectations.  So it can be hard to justify giving to a "cause".  It sounds so nebulous.  What is it actually selling?  Pride?  Bragging rights?  Fortunately, we have a way to redirect our natural selfish instincts.  God created us and He understands them.  He just asks that we use our resources here to bank up rewards in the next life.  And the great thing is, we don't even have to apologize for it!  It's OK to be excited about all the treasure we are storing up in Heaven with the giving we're doing on Earth.  He wants us to be!  As Alcorn points out, this is God's own reward system for us and we are invited to joyfully participate! 

This joyful participation also has another side effect - one that I feel has come into narrow focus lately.  With all of the coverage of the COVID-19 pandemic this year, people are being reminded of the brevity of life and their own mortality.  For some, it is a sober reminder, but for others, it fills them with an inexpressible fear.  Don't misunderstand - life is precious and I hold my loved ones dearly, and want every single moment I can have with them.  But when each person's time comes, I hope that they have a sense of peace.  A peace in knowing where they're going, and knowing that the place being prepared for them is being stockpiled with rewards from their Heavenly Father.  We often think of standing at the gates and hearing the list of what we've done wrong.  But God is also keeping a list of everything we've done right!  Everyone we have helped, shared the gospel with, and sacrificed for.  

My son Liam once said in a moment of self-reflection, "Mom, how do I pay you back for everything you've done for me?"  I just smiled and said, "You don't.  I just do it because I love you."   

- Rebekah Arias

Chapter 3: Compounding Joy

"One day a distraught man rode his horse up to John Wesley (1703-1791), shouting "Mr. Wesley, something terrible happened!  Your house burned to the ground!"  

Wesley weighed the news, then calmly replied, "No.  The Lord's house burned to the ground.  That means one less responsibility for me."  - The Treasure Principle, Chapter 3

"We want to be happier, living a life of flourishing, but we often chase both the wrong things and the wrong paths to get to them.  Even more disturbing is the fact that we are often disappointed when we get the very things we think we want.  We are generally pretty good at predicting whether something is going to be pleasant or unpleasant. We are lousy, however, at predicting the intensity and duration of our future emotional reactions to this event." - "Why are We So Bad at Predicting What will Make Us Happy, RadiologyBusiness.com

Upon reading Chapter 3 of "The Treasure Principle," you can literally feel the joy - more like unbridled glee - that Randy Alcorn has discovered in giving.  It's a heightened sense of being able to not only contribute to the joy of others, but to literally feel God's pleasure in the giving.  As Alcorn states, the feeling of joy in giving is not limited to Christians.  Because all humans are made in His image, we all essentially work the same.  We have the same biology, basic psychology....the same things benefit or hurt us.  Because of this, non-Christians have reached the same conclusions that giving back and philanthropy ultimately offers the most lasting happiness.  

But, I'll be honest.  When I first heard that concept of God being the "owner" of everything, and us being his "money managers" it sounded disappointing.  If I don't own it, I don't get the full power of making decisions with it.  It also disturbingly implies I didn't earn it and despite any hard work, I'm not entitled to it.  So what happens when we are the owners?  Let's take a look at life through that lens.  First of all, the full responsibility of our wealth would fall on us.  And maybe we don't feel wealthy, but living in the US puts us at an enviable level worldwide.  So full responsibility would mean unguided independent decision making.  Well, how good are we at rationally making the financial choices that make us happiest?  Do we ever buy on a whim?  Hoard in order to feel safer and more prepared?  Badly predict an investment?  Bought something that instantly broke, or at least overestimated how happy that shopping spree would make us?   I have done each and every one of these things and my guess is that we all have.  

What God is offering us in being the "owner" is freedom.  It means that He owns all of it, and He also owns all of our ability to create it.  But he actually understands our psychology and loves us more than we love ourselves.  And in understanding us completely, he offers us loving guidance on how to spend it.  And when we lose a large investment, or a house or a job, we are not alone.  I loved the reaction from John Wesley referenced in the chapter upon hearing his house had burned down.  He simply said, "The Lord's house burned to the ground.  That means one less responsibility for me."  Wesley knew he had someone to turn to, who had provided for him once, and would provide for him again.  Alcorn knew, even in the midst of an unfair lawsuit against him, that God would provide for him again.  

In 2013, I had to learn this type of freedom in dependence myself.  I had been working almost 9 years at a software company.  With my job in a secure state, and having survived 2 rounds of layoffs, we felt safe enough to pull out of my 401K for a down payment on a house.  To do this required the signature of our VP of HR on a form stating the security of my position.  (Job loss after taking a 401K loan would mean a massive tax hit.)  So the form was signed, and with this assurance literally in hand, we bought our house in September.  In January of the following year, I got a call from my VP and HR while I was home sick informing me my position had been cut in the 3rd round of layoffs.  Like Alcorn, I was certain that this would mean we would lose our house.  I was afraid I would lose part of my identity.  I thought I'd never find work again.  And I doubted God had any greater use for this time in my life other than the tedious task of filling out job applications.  I was wrong on all counts.  

God knew we would immediately need me at home more because of a sudden illness in the family.  God also knew I needed more time with my children.  He knew that when I returned to work, I needed to be closer to home.   If I were the money owner, and had full power, I would never have chosen this.  But instead, we turned to Him and said, "Well, that sucked.  What do we do now?"  And of course, He had a plan.  

That experience literally became a turning point in our marriage.  We had concrete proof that God doesn't just say He'll pull us through - He actually does it.  It is a long process, but I am slowly learning that the freedom of not NOT owning is better than the crushing burden of doing it all yourself.  And in reading all the stories of joy in the giving, you can't help but want to experience more of God's pleasure in contributing to His work.

- Rebekah Arias

Chapter 2: Financial Giving

"Certainly the passage would be far easier to fulfill if it merely required good intentions on our part.  Instead, it calls us to radical acts of generosity.  We dare not let our convenience and culture - including church culture - dictate our interpretation."  

If you've ever picked up a book on happiness, you've certainly come across this tip in one form or another:  Money spent on experiences is a much better buy than money spent on material goods (aside from necessities).  Experiences, especially with friends, boost our happiness in the short term (during the experience), and in the long term, by strengthening our friendships, and creating shared memories.  

If there was ever a time to test this principle, it would be now.  Regardless of your feelings about the pandemic, the lockdown has affected everyone: young and old, rich and poor.  We have all experienced either financial loss or the fear of it, and we have all had to grapple with various levels of continuous solitude.  For some that live alone, the isolation is extreme.  For others, you are quarantined with your family, but still unable to see friends and "socially calibrate" as we humans tend to do. 

Unsurprisingly, online shopping, one safe activity to do from your house, has increased dramatically.  A recent Forbes article cited a few lucky retailers who saw a 65% increase year over year from mid-March to mid-April 2020.  And that is for non-essential goods.  So here we have our experiment: no experiences to invest in, but lots of Amazon boxes being delivered.  Is it making Americans happier?  Unfortunately, I believe we have proved the original sentiment to be true.  The temporary lift we get from opening that package quickly drops and emotionally, we are back where we started. 

In the next few chapters, Randy Alcorn unpacks the joy we experience when we give.  And it is important to note that even in this financial transaction, the joy comes from the experience we as the giver get to have.  But in this chapter, Alcorn is addressing those who have interpreted Jesus' teaching to be about giving to be more theoretical than literal.  It's important to set this groundwork properly and define the actions Jesus calls us to before we dive into the results of our actions.  

I have been in church and Sunday School my whole life, and I don't think I've ever heard someone interpret this passage so literally.  And yet, considering Jesus speaks about money so often in scripture, and in a literal context, it is clear that Jesus is speaking of financial giving.  It is an ever-present idol in our lives if we let it have that power.  Just like the power of a dark secret breaks once you confess, the power of money breaks when you give it away.  In the next few chapters, we'll see the roadmap of how to put this into action in our own lives.   

-Rebekah Arias

Chapter 1: Buried Treasure

"Imagine yourself near the end of the Civil War.  You're a Northerner, stranded in the South by the war.  You plan to move home when the war is over.  While in the South, you've accumulated lots of Confederate currency.  Suppose you know for a fact that the North is going to win the war soon.  What will you do with your Confederate currency?"

I remember watching a nature documentary recently about bird's mating habits.  Hey, don't judge - we've been in quarantine a long time.  Anyhow, I was fascinated by a seemingly useless habit that preoccupied certain types of birds.  They would spend their days flying around, looking for pretty, shiny novel objects to add to their nests.  You would think after they'd collected a few new decorations for their nest that they'd be content.  But they weren't.  Sometimes they were looking for a mate, and so they thought they must need something more impressive to attract her.  So they collected more.  Sometimes, they would spot a treasure in a rival's nest, and they would stake out their best opportunity to steal it.  And then, they would find a mate.  So, mission accomplished; now he could relax.  And yet, the collecting just continued.  

It was baffling and hilarious....until I realized this was just a microcosm of our American existence.  How often do we spend exorbitant amounts of both time AND money to procure a different, shinier version of something we already have?  It was a humbling and downright sobering realization.  Why do we do what we do?  

The thing is, as Randy Alcorn alludes to in "The Treasure Principle," we as humans are naturally drawn to seek better and better treasures.  We are designed to be discontent with this world since we are made for the next.  But it's so, so easy to think that the treasure is here, but it's just out of reach.  It's just around the bend, just within the next purchase, the next upgrade.  

Alcorn likens our earthly treasures to Confederate currency, which gives us a real-life comparison to draw from.  It had legitimate value at one time, but that value was ultimately fleeting.  Jon and I have had similar experiences leaving foreign countries with pockets full of foreign dollars and change.  A few coins are a fun souvenir, but really, any more than that makes you feel like you should have just gone "all out" at the last gift shop.  

The tired, but true point is that you can't take it with you.  Alcorn takes this adage and adds to it to help shift our focus:  "You can't take it with you, but you can send it on ahead."  He argues that we should be changing our strategy and focus, but not out of guilt or obligation, out of the joy of investing in something that lasts.  

- Rebekah Arias